“If you have come here to help me you are wasting your time, but if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.”

- Lilla Watson

Dearest clients, colleagues and community members,

As sex therapists and mental health professionals, we seek to enhance pleasure and joy in our client’s lives. A pursuit we find gratifying and integral for mental wellness. We also understand, profoundly and innately, that there is no pursuit of pleasure without the assurance of safety.

Safety is not something that occurs exclusively between two people; it is something that needs to be established within communities, industries, systems of governance and through local and foreign policies that promote peace, strive to create a world that is free and liberated for everyone and cares for refugees.

We condemn the recent heinous acts of violence that have massacred thousands of civilian lives in the Middle East, destroyed homes, communities, families and activated ancestral traumas. We stand in solidarity with mental health practitioners calling for an immediate ceasefire in Palestine and the release of all hostages. When the most vulnerable among us are harmed, we are all harmed, and we will not normalize this violence, oppression and state sanctioned mass killings. 

When we are exposed to stories about crimes against humanity we experience what is called vicarious trauma. Vicarious trauma is a very real emotional, psychological and physiological response. It is traumatizing to witness such acts of violence and terror unfolding in real time on social media without the ability to intervene in the moment. These constant exposures go against our core instincts to stop acts of violence, especially against children, and do what we can to shepherd the hurt to safety. Our hearts and minds were not made to tolerate this.

As clinicians, when we feel a lack of safety and uncertainty we reach out to our communities to act locally. We respond to the helplessness and hopelessness of not being able to enact direct change in the war by tapping into our circle of influence and asking what can we do now, how can we give back and what power do we have.

As trauma informed, social justice oriented therapists we have the power and ability to offer pro bono sessions to those affected by vicarious trauma, related grief and loss, activated ancestral trauma and victims of anti-Arab violence and discrimination and anti-Semitism. We will hold space for your fear, hopelessness, grief, anger and trauma. We want to offer a moment to breathe and cry and be heard. For each individual inquiry that we are able to accommodate we will offer 5 therapy sessions at no cost. Please contact Lena Elkhatib directly to schedule your first session, hello@avidintimacy.com

There are other ways to fight against that feeling of powerlessness. The best antidote to vicarious trauma is volunteering directly with underserved communities. For example, here in Chicago we are home to over 20,000 migrants in need of support. When you have a direct connection with a person in need it can help to partially relieve that feeling of helplessness. It is also impactful to notice your circle of influence and speak up, share and help others to understand what is happening and how they too can help. Hold empathy, be curious, be kind. Attend actions, reach out to loved ones and acquaintances who may be struggling and see what you can offer, donate to trusted organizations that promote peace, hold elected officials accountable, aid in humanitarian crises and provide care to victims of war, terror and genocide such as, Doctors Without Borders, and Jewish Voice for Peace, and Palestine Children’s Relief Fund.

Additional resources for folks in Chicago: 

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AVID Intimacy is offering 5 pro bono sessions to those affected by vicarious trauma, related grief and loss, activated ancestral trauma and victims of Islamophobia and anti-Semitism.

To schedule your session, reach out to hello@avidintimacy.com and we will connect you with one of our trauma-informed therapists.